At the peak of a tantrum, the little boy slapped my husband across the face this morning. Not good. He hasn’t hit either of us like that in quite a while. One step forward, two steps back.
Our routine is upset this month. Valentine’s Day, my illness and injured eye, changes at school, pressures at husband’s work, personal finance issues, all of that has left us on edge.
Our son is craving structure that just isn’t there. We’re all craving structure that just isn’t there.
Amazingly, the little boy did actually go to school today. We got there late and we should have joined the line of tardy students waiting outside the office for admission slips, but we didn’t.
My kid can’t handle waiting in a line, so I took him straight to the classroom. I opened the door, kissed him goodbye and pretty much just shoved him inside.
They had already started music time, so naturally he began his school day with yet another tantrum. I watched through the window as he flailed his arms and made it perfectly clear he was mad at anybody and everybody who would listen or look. I walked away.
I took a big load of guilt with me and paraded it in front of my friend as we had breakfast, shopped a bit and sat for coffee this afternoon. My friend was very sympathetic – about the boy, about my puffy red eye, about all of it.
Now I’m home for a few minutes before I have to go get the boy again and my body is caving in to the pressure of the melancholia I’ve been fighting since 8:00 a.m. I dread whatever the aide will surely tell me about my son today. It can’t be good.
At least there’s only one more day before we get a long weekend. We need that time to put some order into our house, our routine, our laundry, our dishes, and maybe even our diets. All of it needs an overhaul. Good old fashioned spring cleaning, that’s what’s we need, for our closets and our psyches.
I’ll let you know if we manage to do it.
P.S. Husband got a new car. We’re a completely Nissan family now. No more Mazda lemons on our tree and that is a very good thing.