Yesterday, my blog and I became a discussion topic in a craigslist parenting forum. Someone cut about half (not all) of my post and pasted it together with the headline “Is it abuse?”
There were a few nice people who came to my defense and even expressed some sorrow for the challenges I face in parenting an autistic child. And there was at least one person who stated that my entire blog ought to be read before any opinion was rendered. I appreciate that.
There was also someone whom I think was trying to defend me, but did so by lumping my behaviors with others she found acceptable. Unfortunately, the behaviors she mentioned are things I would never do and frankly hadn’t even thought of before reading them in her comment. I do appreciate her sentiment though.
When I wrote yesterday’s blog I tried to swallow my pride and put aside my embarrassment to tell you one of the most sorrowful things I have experienced as a parent. It wasn’t easy to think about it so honestly, but I did. It was even harder to write and submit for public scrutiny, but I did that too.
I make no apologies for what I wrote. It was the truth. Do I wish I could turn back the clock and react differently to my son? Certainly. But I also wish he weren’t autistic, because it’s hard.
My son is a smart, funny, lovely little boy, but some of the time there is no way to reach him and I grow weary and depressed. I know there are other parents out there who feel the same way. Maybe you are one of them.
I would be lying if I told you that the craigslist discussion has not been on my mind for the last 24 hours. It most certainly has inspired a wide range of emotions in me, but I am strong. I know there will be more of this if I continue to write, so it’s a good thing that I have developed a very thick skin in the journey with my son.
Today, I promise to keep letting you in. As fearful as I was of having anyone peer into my life just a few short years ago, I now realize that I must invite you if I am to move forward. I vow to tell you where I’ve been and how I got there. I hope that you will come along for the ride.
bockychoy 